Wheelock Chapter 29: Result Clauses

Without a question, the most amazing way to learn about result clauses is to think of them in terms of "your mom" jokes. For real. The grammar terminology gets old fast, and it's so unnecessary, when instead of thinking in terms of superlatives and adjectives of degree, to think about it like:

Tua mater est ita ingens ut ea neccet files.


For the majority of my day, I made these jokes. It never gets old. For instance, as I bought my lunch today at a cafe, I informed a classmate that her mother was so fat that monsters were scared of her. In literature class, I wrote that my essay was so terrible that the teacher was angry. I didn't have Latin class, but I more than made up for it by spending the majority of my second period, after failing to locate a friend, writing your mom jokes in my notebook.

Currently...

I am being flummoxed.

Isn't that a great word? Also, that sentence is in the passive. Cheerio, old bean.

Omegle, Omegli, asl

Recently, Skye and I have discovered the wonderful mayhem of www.omegle.com, a website on which you are connected to a random stranger in a chat-room format. It is overrun with pedophiles and undersexed teenage boys, the rare exception being an arbitrary perverted yet kind Dutchman.

A typical omegle conversation:
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: wanna do it?
You: yes
Stranger: ok
You: ..
Stranger: do u know what it is?
You: im not stupid
You: lol
Stranger: lol sry
You: so how's this gonna work
Stranger: r u m or f?
You: f
Stranger: im m
Stranger: okay
Stranger: so i stick my cock in you and we bounce up and down. then i make out with u, and we have a baby. and then we do it again.
You: oh, sounds good
You: but shouldn't the making out come first?
You: just to be romantic about it and all.
Stranger: oh right
Stranger: yeah it should come first
Stranger: it should
Stranger: so it will
You: okay: REVISED ITINERARY
You: you kiss me tenderly and romantically
You: causing me to fall into your arms
You: then, we fuck
You: then i pee on a stick and cry a lot.
You: repeat.
Stranger: yes thats right
You: well, i'm gonna go now.
You: but glad we discussed this.
Stranger: ok im glad to
You: *too
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You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Are u horny female who wants webcam fun?
You: duh
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
or save this log or send us feedback.